Saturday, 1 December 2012

Am I a Pro?

What do you consider yourself a "pro" at?

This month's BlogHer theme will be interesting to work with. I am currently making the very hard emotional adjustment of losing my dream job because of my brain injury. I was on sick leave for two years, so knew it was coming, but the final paperwork was not completed until October.

I am not sure what the words 'pro' mean to me, in all honesty. I have a diploma as a Human Service Worker (sort of like a partial social worker diploma -- can do some social work tasks, but not eveything. Takes less than 2 years to complete). Also have considerable training as a mediator, but do not consider myself a professional at it (in comparison to others in the feild) although I did have a private practice for several years. I craft, and have made a living at it, both by teaching at a craft store, and by doing custom work. Again, in comparison to others, I do not see myself as a professional: more as one who did the job I was hired to do to the best of my ability at the time, or who does it for the pure enjoyment of the craft, and may or may not happen to make a few dollars out of it in the process.

Perhaps what I have (or had) the best skill in life was in adapting and learning. And it is one reason I find it so hard now with the brain injury when learning some skills just does not stick in my brain at all. I have never had difficulty learning. Actually it has almost come too easy for me, to the point I did not put enough effort into schooling, when I look back on it. I was the kid who was too bored by my lessons to bother doing them. I had an IQ of 138 (when tested in high school) and was in a lot of honours and excellerated learning classes. Those ones I loved. But the regular classes bored me to tears, and I just would not do the homework. Unfortunatley my mother did not value schooling at all, and was very domineering. I became depressed in high school, and listened to her tell me I was too stupid, fat, sick, short, etc to acheive most of my career goals. I let her convince me that post-secondary education was a waste of time. Something that I have deeply regretted most of my life.

I have been very fortunate that my husband is the total opposite of my mother: he values education and learning, and has encouraged me to pursue whatever path of learning or career choice I wanted, and has helped a lot over the years to help me obtain the credentials that I do have.

Now I just have to learn how to make my adaptation and learning skills find a way for the new me to find purpose as I go forth in a world that may or may not hold "work" in the standard definition for me.

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