Tuesday 26 March 2013

Start of a journey

Have not posted anything for a long time. I have been having a horrible time with symptoms since I had botox treatments at the end of January. Life is just barely returning to normal.

I am starting Weight Watchers Online today. Hoping losing some weight will help with the balance issues, and my health in general.

My weight has been an issue nearly all my life. In grade school I was chubby. My mother was an obsessive cleaner, to the point that if you paused in eating -- even to chat, or take a moment to decide if you were full or not -- she would instantly clear away your plate, and you had no chance to eat until the next meal. Snacks were not allowed due to being very poor: food was rationed at all times. It got to the point I would eat nonstop, often swallowing without chewing fully, so that I had a chance to get full before she cleared away the plate, and my chance was gone. Unfortunately this habit of quickly eating much more than I need has followed me some 40+ years later. It is definitely a habit I need to break.

I also eat when I am bored, stressed, happy, sad, etc. I need to learn that food is just for hunger/energy, and not for emotional reasons.

I want to be thin and healthy... I am not sure I have the willpower however to get there. But I am sure going to try.